Chapter 13

Our height is the only major difference between Kendra and me. I'm 5'8 ½", just like Andi. Kendra is barely 5'2". When I stand next to her, I actually feel tall. Of course, I know that I'm not tall. My parents are both over six feet tall, and Jarod is 6'4"! They all love to tease Andi and me about how "short" we are. But next to Kendra, we both look pretty tall. Still, height is really nothing. Who really cares if we're the same size, anyway? Friendship is not determined by size!

Kendra and I could never share clothes with each other or any of that stereotypical best girl friend bonding kind of stuff, because her things would never fit me, and mine would never fit her. (Kendra wears size 8 petite, and I wear size 6 tall.) But really, what is the big deal about sharing clothes, anyway? There are plenty of other things (like our hopes and dreams) that we do share.

In all honesty, I'm kind of glad for the size difference between us. I really don't think that I could wear any of Kendra's clothes, even if we were the same size. I mean, don't get me wrong. The clothes that she wears look really good on her. Believe me; she turns heads wherever she goes.

All Kendra has to do is walk into a room, and all eyes are on her. She's a lot like Andrea in that way – so much more admired and popular than I will ever be! But those clothes simply wouldn't work on me. She likes short skirts and tight, revealing tops. And they suit her. But I would be so uncomfortable if I tried to pull off that style.

Sometimes, though, I wish that fashion was as easy for me as it is for Kendra. Shopping is so easy for my best friend! Invariably, she finds the perfect outfit in the very first store that we try, while I can spend days on end searching and never find anything that fits just right.

Last year, Kendra and I went shopping together for our Fall Ball dresses. As always, the first store we walked into had Kendra's perfect dress on display. It was royal blue, long, and strapless. The bodice was form-fitted to her exact measurements, and the straight skirt had a high slit. She looked absolutely amazing in it, almost like it was custom made just for her! Five minutes into our shopping trip, and she was already done!

The dress was so beautiful on the mannequin that I had to try it on too. I chose one in a dark forest green color. This green dress would have looked terrific on Andrea, since Kendra and Andi both have those nice, even proportions. It did not, however, work for me. It was too tight in the bust and hips and too loose in the waist. I felt like a stuffed sausage, and I was afraid that I might spill out of the top if I inhaled too deeply. I knew that it was a long shot anyway, but it was still heartbreaking to discover how much this gorgeous dress didn't fit me.

Kendra tried to make me feel better about it. "It's fine, Laina," she told me. I knew that it really wasn't fine by the way that she refused to make eye contact. "If this is the dress that you really want, then you should go ahead and buy it. People will probably be so concerned about themselves that they won't even notice that your dress is the wrong shape for you. And we can always do something outrageous with your hair to draw attention away from your body."

I put the dress back, and I heard Kendra breathe a sigh of relief. I guess I will leave the sexy, strapless numbers for people like Kendra and Andi, those gorgeous, perfectly proportioned goddesses! I breathed deeply and tried to prepare myself for a long day of fruitless dress shopping.

Finally, in the very last store in the mall, I found a black, calf-length velvet and lace dress with a fitted bodice, full skirt and capped sleeves. It was a little bit fancier than I thought I wanted, but I tried it on anyway. It fit fine. For once, the dress wasn't too tight or too loose, and it actually mostly fit my lopsided proportions. At least, it fit well enough that I was willing to emerge from the dressing room to let Kendra give me her opinion on it. Most of the dresses that I had tried on were so awful that I didn't even get that far.

I stepped out and slowly twirled for inspection. "Well? What do you think? Does this one work at all?" I asked.

"Hmmm…" Kendra eyed me critically and frowned. "Well, I guess it's better than any of the other dresses that you have tried on today. That purple dress was absolutely horrendous!"

I shuddered. She was right. I had looked absolutely horrible in every dress that I had tried on so far. Even worse, I hadn't even noticed how horrible I looked. I had seriously considered buying a few of the dresses (the horrendous purple one, for example) until I stepped out of the dressing room and Kendra showed me their flaws.

I was starting to think that I was never going to find a dress for the Fall Ball, but I was grateful, at least, that I had Kendra along to stop me before I made a huge fashion blunder! "But what about this dress?" I asked. "I wish that this store had a three-way mirror. I can't even see myself clearly!"

The sales clerk, a rotund, grandmotherly type with silver-white hair, approached. "Oh, we do have a three-way mirror, dear. Come with me. You must see how adorable you look in this pretty dress!"

She took me by the hand and led me, gently but firmly, to the front of the store. She placed me in front of a large three-way mirror, right next to the entrance, where I could easily be seen by anyone who happened to walk by. Then, she stood back, beaming like a proud grandmother, while Kendra offered her unbiased opinion on the dress.

"Well," Kendra began, "I'm not sure. Black is a good color for you, because it's so slimming, and it tends to hide all of those body issues. And like I said, it is better than anything else you've tried on today."

"So I should go ahead and buy it then?" I breathed a sigh of relief. I could finally walk away from the torture of the dressing room. I was free as soon as I put my own clothes back on. I started to walk away from the mirror. I couldn't wait to slip back into my comfortable jeans and t-shirt!

Kendra shook her head and frowned. "Well, I guess you can get it if you really want to, Laina. If you're comfortable with it, then I guess that's all that really matters, right?"

I stopped and turned back to the mirror for a closer inspection. "What's wrong with it?" I asked. "Be honest."

"Oh, nothing. Really, it's fine." Kendra turned her full attention to inspecting the rack of half-price plaid skirts. "Why don't they ever have things in my size?" she cried.

I cringed. Kendra hates plaid. She always says that plaid is what uncoordinated people wear because they think it matches with everything. She would never wear a plaid skirt! I knew that it had to be really bad news if she would rather shop for a plaid skirt than give me her opinion of the dress!

"Kendra," I took a deep breath and spoke slowly, steeling myself for whatever was coming, "just give me your honest opinion of this dress on me, please."

She wouldn't look me in the eyes, but slowly, she spoke. "Well, I didn't want to mention it, because I know how sensitive you are about your weight and everything, but don't you think that it's a little bit too tight on you? I mean, the skirt is fine. The fullness actually hides your big hips. But the bodice is really fitted, isn't it? It shows off your figure a little bit too well, don't you think?"

I turned back to the mirror for a closer inspection. "What do you mean? How does it show off my figure too well?" I squinted and turned slowly, watching my reflection from every angle, trying to see myself through Kendra's eyes.

She fidgeted, clearly uncomfortable with the task of telling me, yet again, that I had picked an unattractive dress. "Personally," she muttered, "I think that it makes you look chubbier than you really are. But if that doesn't bother you, then you should get it. Whatever you're comfortable with. That's all that really matters. I am sure that whatever blind date that Andi digs up for you won't really care what you look like."

I glared at the mirrors. I don't know how I had missed the rolls of flab that were so evident now that Kendra had pointed them out! That's why I never go shopping without her. She always saves me from making a huge fool of myself by pointing out when something makes me look too pale, too chunky, too geeky… whichever adjective applies. Sometimes I wish that she didn't have to save me so often, but I am so grateful that Kendra cares enough to tell me when I don't look good. Everyone else tries to spare my feelings by telling me that I look great when I really don't!

"Well," I sighed, "I guess we can try the outlet stores across town. Maybe they'll have something on the 'irregular' rack that will be perfect for an 'irregular' girl like me!"

"Nonsense, dearie!"

I jumped. I had forgotten that the sales clerk was still there, and her sudden outburst startled me.

"You look just precious in that dress," she gushed. "Why, all of the boys will be lining up to be the first one to dance with you!"

I laughed. Some people will say anything to make a sale! "I appreciate it ma'am, but I don't think so. I'll have to look somewhere else and hope that someone has a dress that will fit me." I turned toward the dressing rooms at the rear of the store and took two full steps before she stopped me.

"Oh, fiddlesticks!" she laughed. "You just wait one minute, missy! I will not have you thinking that I am one of those pushy sales people who will lie and flatter to make a sale. You will get nothing but the honest truth from me. I promise you that!"

She shot a withering look in Kendra's direction, then took me firmly by the elbow and let me back to the store's entrance. But this time, she didn't stop at the mirror. She led me right out of the store to the benches that were gathered in a small seating area outside.

"If you don't believe me," the sales clerk continued, "just ask these handsome young men. They have been sitting on this bench, trying to pretend that they weren't staring at you, for the past 5 minutes!" She pulled me over to the bench closest to the entrance and pointed to Mike and Pete, who were eating soft pretzels and talking about cars.

"Boys, this beautiful young lady needs your opinion," she announced. "She doesn't know if she should buy this dress or not. She is afraid that it isn't flattering on her. So be honest, and tell her what you think of it, okay?"

The clerk smiled and patted my shoulder. "I will be waiting by the register when you are ready to complete the sale, dearie," she winked. Then, she spun on her heel and walked back into the store.